Aktski: Drabbles
by Angel2Demon
Summary: Main drabbling: Akatsuki! Yeah, I was bored and wanted to do it in english. Drabbles and parody about the Akatsuki group, and others. CH2 up.. cracked.up.
1. BLOGS

**A/N:** Drabble!! Yeesss, you don't know how much I looove drabbles, and you probably don't care much about my likings either. Most of the time they are funny, and I'm bounded to humorous drabbles. over-exaggerating Well, this fic contains who-knows how many drabbles of Naruto series. And speaking of which, it will be most of the part 'Akatsuki'-ish drabble-thingy parody… that didn't make any sense.

The famous disclaimer: Seriously, who _does_ own naruto besides Kishimoto… and the studio… and some.. others? .

Warnings: This fic will likely turn out to be incredibly stupid with an enormous amount of mean language and unspecified weird-like situations and this may be rated T… well, I guess so!

- And aside: **English is not my native language!** I know that until now I may have written wrong grammatical phrases and what the heck should I care! As long as you understand me… -which you may don't -… because I really don't understand why you wouldn't since in countries where is spoken English there are people who speak weird- accent –like English too. (?) Thank you!

I'm so sorry if you wasted your time reading that (above). Tsk tsk….. yeah. I know you understand. nods Now, if you didn't read that incoherent text then you may have not seen this either… smile

You won't have to suffer seeing this 'too long' eyesore note again because I have no idea what to put in (A/N thingy) the next drabble… good, huh?

Let's move on, shall we?

* * *

Itachi was in his room, using the internet and looking for blogs to spam with murder comments.

He innocently (as nothing) found a very interesting blog. The girl talked about her life and made videos including her issues. He found _that_ interesting as well.

He saw the title 'I don't'…. he never doubted and clicked it. A new window appeared with a small quicktime video player square with the typical 'buffering…' label at the corner, when a horrible emo song started playing! Gyaahh!

".. she has her life to waste the time.."

And with no sense of lyrics!

Itachi was trying to stop that horrible music but he couldn't find those freaking gray square denominated 'STOP button' anywhere!

The song kept torturing him for almost 20 seconds more when it finally concluded to a stupid end with the word 'EMO'- which he totally agreed.

Finally, he sat down on his chair again an started listening at the girl's made-up face with black lines all over her face making her look more like a corpse.

"This is Niki and I've come to this place, the constitution park, because… I really need this rock right now" she caressed the stone like monument before continuing. "I just can't go home… because … my brother Calvin made this _huge_ humiliating thing to me… (sob) And I can't face him, like, my mom and dad pass by me and don't even notice me.. like, whatever!" She made weird expressions "It felt painful and full of sorrow that night. He was like hugging me and then he threw up this mix of dried lemon chicken, veggies and digestive juice all over my lap in front of everyone!..."

Itachi raised an eyebrow in disgust. That girl was _far away_ from knowing what pain and sorrow is, if you ask him. He imagined the scene and let out a low chuckle.

"… and then my friend Stacey, like, showed me this video on youtube of the incident in the wedding party.. thanks to my uncle Fee. But I made him put it down; it only reached 40 to 50 thousand views…"

Itachi smirked at that statement… _You are such a wuss.._

"And then I saw this weird guy on the video a friend of mine called Hidan or something like that has shown me…" Itachi widened his eyes "this 'pony tail guy', I should call him."

_PONY TAIL GUY!! What the hell?! I'm so going to kill you!_

"In his video-blog he puts up vids about murdering his own 'clan' and that he is part of a group named Achatsuk or whatever… some Chinese name, and this 'pony-tail-guy' keeps spamming all over the internet with murder comments and stuff like that… whatever. And he says he is Pocahontas and he flies _'High'_ sometimes in one of his videos, like, he is a drug addict and a total retarde-"

The computer sliced in two big pieces followed by electric lightings and rays.

Itachi glared at the computer monitor sliced in two with a tremendous rage rising inside him. Then his red enraged eyes looked out the window near him, decided to kill that bastard no matter what.

-.-.-.-.-

Hidan hummed to himself.

" 'sup Hidan" said Kisame while putting Samehada aside. "You look happy today"

"Actually, I am. I'm more than happy! I'm alive! But I'm in a hurry…"

"Were you up to something?" He stared suspiciously.

"You bet! I'm so happy Sasori taught me how to use the computer. It was time for me to pay back someone who really annoys me. So I humiliated that person with his weak point.. The BLOG" smirk.

Kisame watched as the younger smirked and giggled in a confused like way meanwhile he started to walk away. A sudden loud, almost high-pitched voice, coming from Itachi's room direction, startled both of them.

"HIDAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!!!"

"Damn, he already caught me?" Hidan paled.

Kisame just mumbled "You'd better run, Hidan, you'd better run"

* * *

End of chapter 1

I know it sucked and it was short. But hey, it's my first one. I can improve… I guess…

Please, do Review me and tell me what should I improve and –slash- or fix… don't kill me please?

EMO freaky video… ehem. Sorry digitalfilmmaker, I had to write it. All cool, no hard feelings?

A2D


	2. Out On Missions

Tobi was walking curiously around the hideout when he saw the Leader repeating 'oooohhhmmm' and 'sweet peace' in a weird sitting position; he was intrigued about it so he broke in with his usual noisy way of calling people's attention.

"LEADER-SAAAAAMAAAA"

"Peace is over" mumbled the dark man.

"Tobi's got a question for you"

The Leader faced him with a glare. "If you are talking about Hidan, Kakuzu, Itachi and Kisame… yes, I've sent them to multiple assignments" he said coldly.

"Ohh… Can Tobi ask where they went?"

"No. But since you ask…." He smirked mischievously.

-.-.-.-.-

"Stand aside! Your arm is pouring torrents of blood all over my money!" The beast yelled.

"How you dare!" yelped the other. "This is nothing but a scratch!"

"…a scratch?! Your arm's off!"

"No it isn't" He denied with a lousy smirk.

"Then what's that then!" Kakuzu said while pointing at something on the ground.

Hidan stared at it for a few seconds. "Other's arm" he said simply.

"You liar!" Kakuzu stepped back a few steps. He prepared to give Hidan a big thud in his face.

"C'mon, ya pansy!" The other said while moving his weapon of choice around.

-.-.-.-.-

Itachi threw a slap on Kisame's shoulder. "You're it!"

Kisame stared at him, and grinned. "You're it" said and he repeated the same action as his teammate.

"You're it!" repeated Itachi "Quitzies!"

"Anti-quitzies--" started Kisame.

"You're it!"

"Quitzies, no anti-quitzies, no startzies--" started Kisame again.

Itachi glared and pointed at him. "You can't do that!" He yelled.

"You can to" said Kisame.

"Can not, stamp it"

" Can to, double stamp it, no erasies"

"Can not, triple stamp it, no erasies, touch blue make it true" Itachi smirked.

"No no no, you can't triple stamp a double stamp!" stated Kisame looking furious.

"La la la" He covered his ears with his hands.

"You can't triple stamp a double stamp, Itachi!"

"La la la la"

"You can't triple stamp a double stamp" he repeated calmly.

"La la la."

"Itachi!"

"La la la la"

The shark-man tackled his annoying teammate.

"ITACHI!"

-.-.-.-.-

The next day…

Deidara and Tobi were assigned a mission. They had to walk through a ridiculously enormous jungle full of weird creatures and maybe, without luck, they would meet with a few tailed beasts.

"Tobi, you can't keep running away from things. You gotta be tough! Un!" Deidara raised his left hand and closed it firmly letting a grin on his face.

Deidara's eye moved to another target, to something that was moving on the floor.

A high-pitched girly scream scared Tobi to death, and literally because Deidara was only a few inches away. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHRG!" The blonde shrieked.

"AAAAAAAAAAAHH!" he shouted again and grabbed Tobi's arm.

"SNAAAAAAKE!" He shieked out, loud half in shock half in horror, pointing at the small reptile as if it were a culprit of some horrible crime. "OOOOOH NOOOOO!"

Tobi started to flail his arms in the air while running in circles around a tree, with nothing to do but to add some weak, incoherent screams to the scene.

"Don't let it get me!!!" another girly scream surrounded the jungle.

Tobi, still stupefied, kept running in circles moaning weird things…

"Don't stay like that you stupid moron! I HATE THOSE SNAKES!" Deidara grabbed Tobi and shook his life off. "DON'T LET THAT BEAST GET NEAR ME!!"

* * *

End of chapter 2 

A/N: You're it! Yes… a scene of Dumb and Dumber. Just hilarious. Randomness at top, guys. The snake part.. yeah. Thanks Axie, you are always a source of inspiration to me. Lol. I couldn't resist. Deidara HAD to be in that scene.

A2D


End file.
